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"Remember Mum, You deserve to be there!"

Updated: Oct 26, 2022

As a small child , I was brought up in a very violent house household. My father was very controlling , emotionally and physically abusive towards my mum.

I have 2 siblings and I am the youngest . We would often sit on the stairs and witness the violence and hate and obviously this has had a major impact on my upbringing and emotional health

I struggled with my friends normal family lives as we didn't have one, our lives involved walking on egg shells, in case we upset our dad and caused a row. Sundays were a night mare and the hardest day to deal with, as my dad insisted on false family time after beating my mum on a Saturday night.

When I was 13 , my dad left and life calmed down for us and my mum tried her hardest to give us a normal life , even though money was really tight , as he didn't always give financial help .

We no longer received birthday or Christmas cards as he made a new family and we were forgotten.

I have had years of counselling to help with the abandonment and emotional issues and I have struggled to maintain or even form healthy relationships with men.

I have worked so hard to help other women, as some of you know . I have raised money for charities that help with domestic violence and work with young girls who may be living the same life I did or even worse.

I try to reach out to other women and offer non judgmental support but also encourage them to turn things around if possible and inspire them to maybe make a change.

I have not been quiet about my childhood as I feel its important to shout out that I have survived and thrived and I have nothing to be ashamed of.

I have survived and fought against many obstacles including , potentially losing my home, bullying ,and emotional and physical abuse but amongst all this,I helped raise 2 fantastic children.

I have faced a lot of judgement and hate but I wouldn't let that stop me helping others and building myself up.

I am now 54 , I have my own home , built a business and even though I have been single for 3 years , I am making healthier choices when it comes to men.

I realise though, that sometimes Imposter Syndrome plays a big part in my life.

I sometimes struggle to recognise that I am good at my job and that I deserve happiness.

So it came as a big shock when I was asked to attend a reception for female entrepreneurs , at The Houses Of Parliament by my local MP , Ellie Reeves, to celebrate International Womens Day with Sir Keir Starmer .

Wow I am a female entrepreneur! Me? and why am I being chosen? Is this real? I started to ask all these questions in my head . It didn't seem right , that I would be asked and that I deserve such an invite .

When I told my 28 year old son , his words stuck with me , "Mum remember , you deserve to be there ". This sentence has stuck with me and the light bulb switched on, I sat back and started to look at everything I had overcome and what I had achieved, YES, I do deserve this, I am a survivor!

I did this, and now my life truly begins . No more labels or excuses from me , just positive and healthy decisions and continued help to others , who need to find the emotional and financial strength to also survive.

Remember you are worth it and that no matter what is ahead of us women right now, we must stand together, united and strong . Never underestimate your power and strength!


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